My mom wants me to eat healthy. I'm a size 36 waists and I need to go on a diet. But I like like junk food. Because Junk food taste good.
-Greg
Hi my name is Kyle and Satan's name is Lucifer
-Kyle
phone rings* Mr. Figueira, “I'm not going to answer that”
Kyle: Do you want me to cut the cord and crush it!
I can speak Russian flarg hafd blak madre. Ok that really wasn't Russian that was gibberish. It is easier to speak gibberish than it is Russian. Thats why I speak gibberish.
-Greg
I know all the Spanish words but I don't have time to speak it. But I can tell you one word. It's amigo
-Greg
Greg: I forgot your name
Jenny: my name is Jenny
Greg: oh, your the one Mathew hates
Grevous means a giant killing maniac
(Grevous: character on star wars)
Lets stop talking about this grevous non-sense
-Kyle
You know I get angry at little kids. Because this little kid bit my brother-in-laws finger.
-Greg
You could get so mad that you could rip your own brain off!
-Kyle
Mr. Figueira, I've never seen you upset because your bubble is far away. So I've never seen you upset before.
-Greg
Disney has a lot of sequels that you don't know. Pocahontas, hunch back of Notre-dam, Jungle book.
-Kyle
She's not a princess, she doesn't wear pink, she doesn't wear a dress, and princesses live in a castle.
-Greg
I tickled a brown teddy bear
-Bryant
Can I say one thing? Wahoo!!!
-Charlie
Being different is freakin' stupid!!!!
-Greg
Charlie: I would like to meet George Washington... is he dead?
Figueira: Yes, he died a while ago
Charlie: Oh dear!
I have issues. I hate stupid bus drivers!
-Kyle
God is Fire
Jesus Christ is Ice
The Holy Ghost is Lightning
-Kyle
My dads mom made me a puzzle of monsters, BAD NEWS; my mom's parents are dead! I never saw them again.
-Kyle
I hate birthday parties, I hate kids, I hate being a clown
-Kyle
(frantic) I've looked for Mathew and I can't find him anywhere! I can't do this alone! (sprints out the door)
-Greg
I like chicken because I like to strip the meat off its bones!
-Kyle
Margarete: Hey Charlie what would you do if I took your hat?
Charlie: I would cut your legs off!!
tardy bell rings
Mr. Figueira: who is here?
Greg: Looks like I'm here...(as he says in a voice under his breath)
Mr. Muffler: Kyle would you like to work at a grocery store?
Kyle: N...O...
Mr. Muffler: Tell us way
Kyle: BECAUSE IT WOULD BE TO HARD!
Will: Kyle what is on the drink isle?
Kyle: Hmm... I don't know... Alcohol
Mr. Muffler: Kyle do you like winter or summer more?
Kyle: W..I..N..T..ERRRRRRR (voice drops is he says err)
I shaved my eyebrows once, my mom was laughing and my dad was disappointed.
-kyle
3 comments:
JAKE,
This is funny stuff! Where did you get these from? Did you actually hear all of these and write them down when you were in class one day?
Love, Lani
JAKEY!
hahah k i love these. Especially the ones about Satan and stuff. "Being different is stupid!!!" I wish i could watch them all happen.
I forgot to type my comment about these hilarious statements! I love your posts, Jakes! I'm glad you took time to take notes in your classroom, that has to be hard to do, so kudos for you. It is nice to take time to laugh at your situation. U r an inspiration 4 sure.
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